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Looking for a new challenge? – Retrain as a Delta Smelt

Cool smeltHelp restore one of California’s most endangered species while supporting California’s water supplies in a time of drought.

The Federal government is beginning a program for the unemployed to retrain as much-needed Delta Smelt.  Following a two-day course, candidates will learn to:

  • Seek out turbid waters
  • Spawn in sand at secret locations
  • Surf the tides
  • Make themselves present for counting in mid-water trawls

Major California water projects and water users are preparing to hire successful graduates for 1-2 year non-renewable contracts.  Minimum qualifications:Smelt 2

  • Must be shorter than three inches
  • Swim poorly
  • Smell slightly of cucumber
  • Be translucent

Occupational risks include:

  • Consumption by bass
  • Entrainment by pumps
  • Getting lost in Delta channels
  • Relocation to Southern California

As an endangered species, actual employment conditions will likely comply with State social distancing requirements.

For information, please contact: cygnusjobs-4-u.net

Smelt touch

About jaylund

Professor of Civil and Environmental Engineering
Director, Center for Watershed Sciences
University of California – Davis

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